Come to a Decision

Have you noticed that I've posted a lot in the last few days.  I've had a lot of thoughts and I like to write them down when I think of them.

I'm not taking many pictures with my camera.  My camera is annoying me.  Not only did I lose the memory card, but I haven't bothered to replace it because the card-reader on our computer is broken so I can't upload from the card anyway.  Which means that I have to use the camera's internal memory and upload with the USB cable...and I can't take as many pictures that way.  Bother.

But that's not what this post is about. 

It's about relinquishing control. 

Sometimes when it comes time for a change you know it.

All along in this homeschooling journey Josh and I have had an understanding of two main things.  One is that the kids would decide for themselves if they wanted to go to high school.  The other was that any homeschooling that took place from about puberty on would be managed by him.  Not because I don't feel that I'm smart enough - just that it seemed like a great way to wean the child off a dependence on having a teacher always there...and give them the chance to learn how to take an assignment, do it, and then return and report.

On Thursday night as I was chattering away about a bunch of topics to Josh, the phrase..."perhaps it's time for you to take over Hannah's education" came spilling out of my mouth - pretty much by accident.  And right away I just knew that it is time.  It felt so right, immediately.  So incredibly right that I can hardly wait!  We've had this planned for years.  Hannah can take her study materials and laptop to Josh's office and work there for as many hours a day as she needs before coming home to work on whatever else she wants to study (music, etc).  I'm starting to think about Brynne and Logan and what sorts of things we're going to do together.  Preschool with the little ones is not too far off in the future.  It's going to change the way our family operates a bit.  I can't tell you how much I rely on Hannah.  She's grown up.  She's the kid I can depend on - every time - to sense when I have a baby hanging on my legs that needs to be distracted so that I can cook dinner.  If I ask her to clear the dishes after dinner she clears...and then finishes the rest of the job.

I'm not giving those example to show what a perfect child she is.  Because she's not.  (I could give some examples of that but I won't - especially because I think she reads this blog).  Just to show that she's reached a new level of responsibility, and that carries over into her education.  She's ready to move to the next level of studying.

It's a crazy thought.  I can't believe how fast her childhood has flown by.  I'm going to miss having my biggest helper and sidekick available.  But she's got to take care of her own needs and pursue her own goals without our daily living patterns distracting her.

The really sad thing is that Brynne is not too far behind and I'm going to be out of another awesome helper before too long.  Dang it!  Why do kids have to grow up so fast!